Every kiss was like a drop of water on a stone. John could feel them wearing him down. Each kiss was opening him up, making him softer and smoother and making him want to say things, confess things, things that stuck in his throat and scratched like thorns. How long had it been? Minutes, hours, days - how long had Rodney been kissing him? And just kissing him - nothing else, just kisses.

John wanted to say something. He wanted to pull Rodney down on top of him and feel solid weight pinning him to the bed. But Rodney had other ideas. He'd put John on the bed flat on his back, then braced himself on his hands and started the kissing. John reached up, and Rodney stopped.

John's hands went flat next to his hips and stayed there. He didn't even dare to clutch his fingers into the blanket for fear that Rodney would stop, that Rodney would take his mouth away.

"Say it, John." Rodney pulled back just enough to speak before leaning in again to resume the slow, soft kisses. John breathed hard into Rodney's mouth. He should just say it. If he did, Rodney might give him more, might take his mouth for real, take the rest of him. John wouldn't stop him. But he couldn't get the words out.

The pauses between kisses got longer, and John groaned. Pulling back again, Rodney said, "Say it."

John opened his eyes. Rodney was watching him with grave interest, looking for all the world as if he might just get up and leave. John bit his lip, blinking rapidly.

After a long moment, Rodney smiled, a short flattening of lips. His eyes went shuttered for a bare second, and then he lowered himself down and to the side. He gathered John to him and kissed his forehead, his neck, the line of his jaw. He didn't say "it's okay," but John heard it all the same.

When Rodney stopped kissing his neck and just rested his head against his shoulder, John finally lifted his hand, cupping Rodney's jaw. He rubbed the pad of his thumb back and forth.

He tried, and failed, to speak. Closing his eyes, John cleared his throat. "I...," he had to lick his dry lips. "Just you, Rodney," he said, leaning in to kiss the side of Rodney's mouth. "Just you."