Sometimes at night I come into the kitchen and I open the blinds over the sink a little - just enough to let the moonlight in. There's an old radio that Xander keeps on the windowsill. UC Sunnydale runs a radio station, and they have this nighttime show where they play old stuff. The DJ likes some really strange shit - one night he played the New York Dolls for two hours - that was great. Anyway, I was sitting at the table when I heard Xander get up - he usually sleeps pretty hard, but he's been a little restless since things changed between us. It's not been long, so we're still figuring it all out.
He came into the kitchen, rubbing his eyes like a little kid, his hair sticking up all over. He saw me sitting at the table and just leaned in the doorway and stared at me for a minute. The DJ was talking low in that silky DJ way, where you don't really have to hear the words, the tone just slides you from one song to the next. So he shuts up, and the song starts. It started with just a cello - mournful and lonely-sounding.
Well, Xan looked at me and I looked at him, and he smiled, just the tiniest little bit. Then he came over and took my hand and pulled me up onto my feet. Before I could figure out what happened, I was in his arms and we were dancing - just shuffling our feet, really. We probably looked like a right pair of gits - him in his plaid flannel sleep pants and me in my oldest jeans with the top button undone, both barefoot with no shirts.
It was an old REM song, and Stipe's voice was almost a sad as the cello's, but it seemed right.
Readying to bury your father and your mother,When the song was over, we just sort of stopped moving, and he kissed me. It wasn't our first kiss, but it was different. I can't really explain it better than to say that it was like a promise. I kissed him back; trying to put all the stuff I couldn't say into it. I think he got the message, because he kissed me one more time and led me to his bed.
What did you think when you lost another?
I used to wonder why did you bother,
Distanced from one, blind to the other?Listen here my sister and my brother
What would you care if you lost the other?
I always wonder why did we bother,
Distanced from one, deaf to the other.Oh, oh, oh but sweetness follows
It's these little things, they can pull you under.
Live your life filled with joy and wonder.
I always knew this altogether thunder
Was lost in our little lives.Oh, oh, oh but sweetness follows.
Oh, oh, oh but sweetness follows.
It's these little things, they can pull you under.
Live your life filled with joy and thunder.
Yeah,
yeah we were altogether
Lost in our little lives.Oh. Oh. Ah.
Oh, oh, oh but sweetness follows.
Oh, oh, oh but sweetness follows.
That was last night.
He'll be home soon, and he'll find me here, just where he left me.