When John opens the door, he's still blushing just as hard as he was in the gate room. Rodney shoulders him aside and walks in, and the door shuts behind him.

"Lock that," he says, gesturing toward the door. "I had to body-check Lorne and trip Chuck to get here first. Thank god for hockey."

"What?" John yelps.

Rodney gives him a hard look. "You can't go sprinkling sex toys all over the gate room like some sort of gay porn fairy and not expect to get jumped, John." He steps forward, and John finds himself being backed up against the wall. "Besides," Rodney says, pulling something out of his pocket and brandishing it. "You forgot one."

John blushes even harder to see that what Rodney has in his hand is a thing that he's pretty sure is some sort of Pegasus Galaxy vibrator. Variable-speed, if he's not mistaken. He knew he should have just walked away from that particular stall at the bazaar. He knew it. Stupid magpie-like inability to not be distracted by shiny things. Shiny sex toy things. He looks down when he realizes his eyes are glued to the toy Rodney's waving at him and that his head is moving back and forth like he's a spectator at Wimbledon.

Someone bangs on the door then, and only Rodney's quick hand keeps John from smacking the back of his head against it.

"Everything okay in there, sir?" Lorne sounds polite and casual. And out of breath.

"Everything's fine," John says, aware that he sounds a little choked.

"Everything's perfect," Rodney says. "In fact, everything's so perfect that we're taking the afternoon off. You're in charge, now go away."

"Sir?" Lorne calls through the door.

"What he said," John calls back, his eyes still on the vibrator in Rodney's hand. "Dismissed."

As soon as Lorne's footsteps recede, Rodney brandishes the toy one last time. "On the bed," he says. "I'll be right back."

John may be indiscreet and a little easily distracted, but he's not stupid. When Rodney comes back from the bathroom, drying the vibrator with a towel, John's naked and spread-eagled on the bed and there's a tube of lube on the pillow beside him. Rodney's on the bed and kissing him before John can brace himself, and he knows he's giving way too much away, his arms and legs winding around Rodney's body, his hips moving restlessly.

He half expects Rodney to try and gentle him, to slow him down, but it doesn't happen. Rodney kisses John with everything he's got - open and desperate and wild. John manages to start tearing at his uniform, and Rodney breaks the kiss long enough to strip.

"Yeah," John groans when Rodney's big, hot hand wraps around his cock and strokes him, tight and hard and perfect. "Yeah, Rodney. Please."

"I'm going to use every single one of those toys on you," Rodney says, his breath gusting against John's ear. "Every one of them. And just me, nobody else, got it?" He squeezes John's cock warningly.

"Yes," John says, halfway between a moan and a yelp - Rodney's hurting him just enough. "Just you." He makes a noise of protest when Rodney lets him go, but Rodney doesn't make him wait long. John has just enough time to draw in a breath when the cold, wet tip of the vibrator touches the entrance to his body. He sighs as Rodney slowly starts working it inside.

"Oh," Rodney says, leaning up on his free hand. "That looks good. You look good. More?"

"Yes," John says, and he lifts his hips. Rodney slowly pushes the toy all the way inside, then he turns it on. John's whole body tenses as vibrations start up and begin building in intensity. He feels like he's going to shake apart, like the only thing that's anchoring him is Rodney's hand pressing him to the bed. Rodney pulls the vibrator back and changes his angle, finding the perfect spot. John's way too close to the edge, but he can't even draw enough breath for a warning.

He doesn't need to. Rodney adjusts the angle and the vibration one more time, them leans down to catch John's cock in his mouth just as he starts to come. Heat and wet and movement and inside, and John comes apart in Rodney's hands, in Rodney's mouth - shaking and deaf and blind.

When he gets his senses back, the toy is lying on the towel, the blanket is pulled up to his waist and Rodney is propped on one elbow, watching him.

"One down," Rodney says, smiling.